From a local paper:  Highway floral displays face cuts

From an e-mail, in which a chocolate shop was apparently having an Easter sale: 20% off Toady!!!!
(The poor toady: you know it's a harsh economy when even henchmen get downsized...)

From Yahoo!, of course:

Fish eats cell phone, still works after a week

We hold this headline to be self-evident:

[my town] evaluates teachers pay scale

If you have to make budget cuts, I'll chip in for the apostrophe!

I bought myself one of those plastic bento boxes to carry my lunch at work, and while I was gone for the holiday, it arrived in all its glory: cute little three-layered box with dragonflies in the corner, cute little matching chopsticks, a carrying bag and an elastic strap to hold the tiers together.

And then I noticed this was on everything...even the box lid:

WeirdLabel

That's right: it says "LUBE SHEEP." Who knew dragonflies were like that?

I love Shiny Shiny, the woman-oriented gadget site from the UK, more than I should love anything that routinely encourages me to spend my money on robot bunnies and USB necklaces. But this headline gives me the willies:

Review: Trialling the GO!View service on the PSP

"Trialling." That's......not a word. It may be even less of a word than "irregardless*" or "incentivize." They're trying to say "trying." They are metatrying. They should please stop.

*Yes, I know "irregardless" is in the dictionary now. And if the editors jumped off a bridge, I...come to think of it, I'd have a much better chance of taking it back out!

I watched Iron Man again last weekend and for the first time noticed that one of the little newspapers from the opening montage talks about Tony Stark taking over the "Reigns" of the company. As opposed to the reins, those things one uses to steer horses.

Sigh...

Cost of making Iron Man: a bazillion dollars, give or take whatever will get you down in the hundred-million range;

My proofreading fees per hour: Not much at all.

Do the (approximate) math, guys. I'll give you three hours of proofreading for whatever you pay Robert Downey, Jr. to cock an eyebrow on film. Deal?

...do I never get anything this hilarious to look over?

[Note: just about the worst thing that could have happened to me happened a couple of weeks ago: I lost someone who was probably my best friend in the world. So posting will be sporadic, and may not make much sense.]

Is Yahoo actually trying out an Engrish-sounding headline for a story about China?

Cadbury says Chinese-made chocolate have melamine

(In which I use a non-real-word title to draw attention to words. I'm clever that way.)

I really don't know what my local NPR station personnel are trying to do: make sure I'm awake? Make me wonder about the pressures on people who have to try to speak Standard American English at a radio station in Southwest Virginia?

They do all these things, but what they do even more is drive me up the wall with their pronunciation of the word "museum." Between Myoozeem Woman and her weekend sidekick Myoozim Girl, I'm about ready to pack it in on arts news coverage in my area.

Is this a regional thing for somebody? Anybody? I pronounce it with three syllables, even if the third one is barely discernable as such, and so does the dictionary.

If these people were instead reading ghost stories, would our protagonist be trapped in a mausoleem?

I don't usually post a lot of work-related stuff, but this one seemed sufficiently generic and made me laugh:

[ ] My employer has a matching git program.

Who'd admit that it did? :-)